One more final tomorrow and then I'm free to wallow in my depression over leaving/ celebrate going home/ take in the city for my last two days. Then I fly to MN on the 21st.
OR DO I.
As you surely know, that is also the day the world is predicted to end. I have thought through a lot of potential scenarios. Here are the most likely:
1) The world bursts into flames. Everyone on Earth is incinerated in an instant. However I, unaware, am safe on an airplane watching romantic comedies and laughing at SkyMall pillows. The flames die out during my flight and I arrive safely on land. It's now up to me and the other Plane People of 2012 to repopulate Earth. Colonies develop and alliances are made between airlines. On Earth 2.0, food consists solely of charred plants and endless peanuts. Some LOST-type stuff probably happens. That weird redhead Safety Instruction video lady who goes "Smoking is not allowed" becomes a God figure. Everything's pretty jungly for awhile, but people are generally into it, etc.
Greatest concern: Locating most attractive male/ future mate upon boarding.
2) Science and/or God did not plan for airplanes, so we have not been worked into the equation. All Sky Humans are vanished into another dimension.
Greatest concern: I picture that dimension either looking boring/empty like when Squidward goes waay too far into the future, or being really messy with a lot of space garbage.
3) First one to the gates, y'all! No lines because I was already halfway up here when this business started. Some beezies try to budge (don't some always) while pretending to be on the phone or something, but God was totally watching and that was a test all along.
Greatest concern: Movies tell me that the paperwork process to get in to heaven is super arduous, and I'm not in the mood after finals.
Another possibility is that this'll go down right at midnight, therefore my flight is irrelevant. Which would suck because I'll have gone through the effort of packing, but otherwise the scenario isn't that bad. I can feel accomplished for finishing out the semester, plus I spent my last few months going to the best places on Earth with wonderful friends.
I've heard a lot of students say it's bad that we'll have spent our whole lives in school, but are they kidding? That would be ideal. Never having to face real life. Why do they think Masters programs exist? Everyone wants to hide in school.
Except that finals are a nuisance. I guess I should go study for that last one. So close.
Goodnight and a very Happy Doomsday to you all.
Lauren
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